5 Books I'd Like To Eat...

There are many books that I would like to eat (for multiple reasons), but I am limited to selecting only 5. Here goes!

1. The Oxford English Dictionary
I would eat this book because it consists of pretty much every word used in the English language. I would never again be stumped by words such as "efficacious" and "superfluous".I would be able to say absolutely every word I ever needed to know, and I'd know the meaning of all of those words. I would literally be a walking dictionary. Awesome!

2. The Canadian Encylopedia (all volumes)
I would eat this set of books because contained within the pages is a wealth of knowledge. My brain would become an information database and I would be a genious! There is basically nothing I would not know!

3. The Oxford Thesaurus of English
I would eat this book for two reasons. Firstly, I enjoy saying its name - "thesaurus" - has a nice ring to it, no? And secondly, I would eat this book because after I found the meaning of the words, I could find a better way of saying them ... I'd substitute "pleonastic" for "superfluous". In essence, I would sound much more intelligent after eating this book.

4. Twilight (the complete series)
I would eat this series of books because they do not deserve to remain readable! They are basically pop "crap". Though Mark Twain said, "Those who do not read are no better off than those who cannot", it is arguable that these books will leave you with nothing more than wasted time. I personally feel that you should not "waste" your time reading books like Twilight when you could be reading something such as M. Scott Peck's "The Road Less Travelled" and come away with enlightenment. Thus, I would rid the world of Twilight (and other books like it if I were allowed to select more than 5 books to eat).

5. In Search of Lost Time
According to Amazon.com, "This novel, while generally published in several volumes is considered a single novel and is in the Guinness Book of World Records for being the longest novel". I would read this book if I was truly hungry because there are so many pages my famine would turn to fullness. That is why I would eat this book.

So, there you have it! That is my list of books that I would eat, for different reasons. However, if I was really given the option to actually and literally eat books ... I would not do so. No thanks. I'll still to chocolate.